/* ** ************************************************************************* ** ************************************************************************* ** ** NN NN SSSSSS XX XX ** NNN NN SS SS XX XX ** NN N NN SSS XX ** NN N NN SSS XX ** NN NNN SS SS XX XX ** NN NN SSSSSS XX XX ** The Non-Sequitur Express ** « an eclectic e-newsletter, e-published irregularly » ** Produced by Phillip Thorne ** nsx.underbase.org ** ** Volume 6, Issue 1: Sunday, 14 January 2004 ** Previous issue: Sunday, 7 December 2003 ** ** ************************************************************************* ** ************************************************************************* */ OBS & COGS: Red Cross, chefs, the sky, frog noises, TV, Tele-Blue-Mum. LETTERS: Digital camera storage, Japanese text. CRAFTING: Beacon-brand CraftFoam Glue. TOYS: Transformers G1 re-issues, Unicron, Energon, Alternators. ON THE WEB: "The Brick Testament", anime music radio, rescue robot. SOMNABULA: "The Dairy-Case of Flying-Sideways Doom." http://www.underbase.org/nsx/ - back issues http://www.underbase.org/blog - NSX::Blogmode http://www.underbase.org/nsx/index_plus.htm - extra content /* *************************************************************************** ** OBSERVATIONS & COGITATIONS ** ** Penn-Jersey Red Cross gets confused. ** Chef techniques make no sense for home cooks, duh. ** Look at the sky. ** Frogs vs. kittens. ** TV ad demonstrates difference between opinion and fact. ** Marge Simpson's avant-garde sensibilities. ** ************************************************************************ */ The Penn-Jersey Region of the American Red Cross is confused. In thef fortnight preceding Christmas, I received mailings inviting me to three separate holiday blood drives -- 24, 27 and 28 December. (Donations typically drop during this period.) I called the telephone reservation center (1-800-GIVE-LIFE) to schedule an appointment on the 27th, but their database wasn't aware of that option. Cook books based on the techniques of restaurant chefs rely on a variety of sauces and stocks. Chefs can amortize this component- making effort across a day of entrees, but home cooks can't. Therefore, avoid such recipes. (This self-evident tip reported on NPR.) Has anyone been looking at the night sky lately? Whoa, go Saturn! Or is it Jupiter? Shiny! The defense call of the Cuban tree frog resembles that of a kitten in distress. (From Animal Planet: "Amazing Animal Rescues.") *** In a recent Wal*Mart TV ad, the generic teen male spokesperson asserts: "If you've any free time, you've gotta play the Xbox, cause there's nothing really better to do." As someone who engages in many non-Xbox activities, I feel compelled to state, for the record -- THAT IS A FOUL LIE! Or an unsupportable opinion. Or, at the very least, an appalling bit of ad copy. Taste: "I like to play Xbox games." Opinion: "There's nothing better than Xbox games." Fact: "Xbox games are an alternative to books, hobbies or sports." *** For fans of avant-garde performance art: "[The Teletubbies] make the Blue Man Group look like Mummenschanz." --Marge Simpson in "The Simpsons" episode 1508/EABF03: "Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens, and Gays" (4-jan-2004). http://www.thesimpsons.com http://www.teletubbies.com http://www.blueman.com http://www.mummenschanz.com /* *************************************************************************** ** READER LETTERS ** ** Digital cameras and extreme storage ** "Simpsons" couch scene anime homage ** ************************************************************************ */ Have feedback -- clarifications, congratulations, contradictions? Send it to nsx@underbase.org, or use the response-feature of NSX::Blogmode at www.underbase.org/blog/. To "TECH ANALYSIS: Digital cameras and extreme storage" in Issue 5.4, I received two replies: CRM of PA includes these links to a composite giga-pixel image of Bryce Canyon, and a white paper on the giga-pixel CCD for the proposed SNAP (SuperNova/Acceleration Probe) satellite: http://www.tawbaware.com/maxlyons/gigapixel.htm http://www.stsci.edu/stsci/meetings/space_detectors/pdf/giga.pdf http://snap.lbl.gov/ SW of PA makes these comments: "... There's a big push underway to switch to a graphics file format that uses 32-bit floating-point for each of R, G, B, and A, and given that the IEEE 754 standard defines floating point both at 32 bits and 64 bits, it wouldn't surprise me if somebody upgraded it to 64-bit FP in the not-too-distant future. 4096x3072x256 comes out to 384 megabytes per frame (22.5 gigs for every one second at a standard 60 FPS produces 79 terabytes per hour) ..." *** To "ANIME NEWS: 'Simpsons' couch scene anime homage" in the same issue, SW further comments: "[On the bench,] it was actually 'Shimpusonsu,' but that's as close as Katakana can get." He also notes that written Japanese uses, not only the five writing systems I described, but also: "... various oddball pictograms that just looked cool. Visit a Japanese web site and you'll see plenty of [...] things ostensibly out of the Wingdings font [...] because their printed material has historically included those symbols as well. In particular, there's a common X-with-dots symbol that gets used all over the place to indicate 'end of document,' so chosen only because it had a pleasant shape and was vaguely similar to a European typographer's mark for indicating end-of-paragraph." /* *************************************************************************** ** CRAFTING REVIEW ** ** Beacon-brand CraftFoam Glue ** ************************************************************************ */ Like to make masks? Looking for a lightweight, easy-to-manipulate material? Craft stores now carry sheets of 1/8" foam rubber, typically in 9"x12" and 12"x18" sizes; eg Craft Foam(r) by XYZ Imports(r) and Flexi-Foam(tm) by Fibre Craft(r). Ordinary white glue will bond it, but an alternative is CraftFoam Glue(tm) by Beacon(tm) (an imprint of the Beacon Chemical Co., US/NY/Mt.Vernon). CFG goes on white and dries to a clear, tacky state. According to the package, you can air-dry it, use a hot-air dryer, or microwave it. The first method should take 15-30 minutes, and the last, 15-30 seconds. In my tests, air-drying didn't occur even after 60 minutes, and the microwave took over 60 seconds. The microwave method has several drawbacks: the foam distorts, the glue bubble, and one or the other give off a horrible, persistent stench [1]. Also, the uncured glue is difficult to spread into an even layer. The cured glue is fearsomely sticky [2], and will instantly bond two pieces of foam. *** [1] Plastic odor: it's not the odor of burning polystyrene. I know that, because I once used a soldering iron to impart battle damage to "Robotech" model kits. [2] Unlike cyanoacrylates, CFG won't bond skin to skin, but it'll bond most anything else in your work area. Cyanoacrylate (CA, or "super") adhesives rely on the atmospheric moisture found on most surfaces; this moisture inactivates a stabilizer molecule, permitting the balance to transform into a thermoplastic solid. This is probably not the same principle as the "water monolayer" cited in _Danny Dunn and the Universal Glue_, the final book in the 1956-1977 juvie series that chronicled the serendipitous adventures of a boy whose mother is the housekeeper for an independently wealthy scientist-inventor. Remember: chemical technology can never advance unless you overturn the beaker onto the stove! http://www.bookloversden.com/series/boys_children/Dunn.html http://unofficial.umkc.edu/crossonm/dannydunn.htm /* *************************************************************************** ** TOYS ** ** Transformers: ** "Generation One" re-issues ** Unicron ** "Energon" ** "Alternators" and 20th Anniversary Optimus Prime ** ************************************************************************ */ Remember the first three years of Transformers toys, 1984-86, before Hasbro went overboard with {Head, Target, Power, Micro, Action}masters and Pretenders? Still regretting how you dismantled them, shoved them under gravel, exposed them to butane lighters or simply permitted your parents to discard them? You're in luck! For the past year, Hasbro has been re-issuing selected toys from that era (so-called "Generation One" or "G1"), appropriately updated to modern safety standards. The sixteen toys released to date, at price points of $29.99 to $49.99, are: Jazz, Prowl and Smokescreen and Silverstreak (né Bluestreak), Red Alert, Tracks; Hoist; Grapple and Inferno; G1 Optimus Prime, Powermaster Optimus Prime with Apex Armor, Ultra Magnus; Rodimus Major (né Hot Rod); Skywarp, Starscream and Thundercracker. http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/pl/page.browse/r.3/subbrandid.62/dn/default.cfm No, there are no plans to re-release Decepticon Leader Megatron the Handgun. While this is one of the most vicious recurrent topics in online discussion (right up there with "Optimus! Trukk not Munky!"), because of US toy laws, Megs is stuck as a tank. The primary official Transformers pages are: http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/ http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/pl/page.news/dn/default.cfm *** Remember Unicron, the transforming planet-eating robot planet [3] (as voiced by Orson Welles) from 1986's "The Transformers: The Movie?" Many of the characters from that film didn't get toys, but Unicron was the one fans wanted. Two prototypes were created at the time, but their designs were disappointing. A third was created by Takara (Hasbro's Japanese partner) in 1999, in the wake of Japan's "Beast Wars Neo" TV series, and circulated to gauge interest. The fourth and latest version ties into the "Armada" TV series. It's not quite a sphere -- more of a Viking helmet with a ring around it. The robot mode, however, has been well-received: big, posable, adjustable hands, with lots of missile-firing and electronic light-and-sound gimmicks. It's now being re-issued with a new color scheme [4] for the "Energon." (Beware: I've seen "Armada"-orange packaged in "Energon"-grey boxes.) *** The latest original toy line is called "Energon," a direct sequel to the storyline of "Armada." (The storylines in the TV show and the Dreamwave comic adaptation are different; for that matter, due to dubbing issues, the US and Japanese stories diverge. This is nothing new.) In "Armada," the gimmick was "Mini-cons," small robots that could unlock features of the larger toys. "Energon" has several gimmicks of its own: Translucent plastic, not seen since "Beast Machines," used for transformable weapons. The weapons come in several parts attached to the vehicle mode, then can recombine several ways as hand-held weapons. The pieces from different robots swap, and they fit into the "Power-Linx" sockets from "Armada." The first toys to be released have been well-received. The story-premise is that these "Omnicons" can siphon raw energon and transform it, replicator- style, into custom weapons [5]. Binary fusion: two robot-modes of the same scale can combine into a single larger robot. This has been poorly received, as most such combinations have awkward proportions, or leave extra limbs hanging off the body. Also, the vehicle-modes thus far released have had heads sticking out. "Megazord" Optimus Prime: actually, the name's a "Power Rangers" joke. The latest version of the Autobot leader is, once again, a semi-truck with trailer; but this trailer contains four smaller vehicles that can attach to his limbs. It's been poorly received, because the uncombined "Fatimus Prime" has skinny limbs, and his cab-mode doesn't look like anything. *** The "Alternators" line consists of classic G1 characters with updated vehicle modes (1:24 scale) and revised transformations; and their handguns fold up as part of the vehicle. In the US, they're plastic, but in Japan they're being released in die-cast metal under the "Binaltech" label. Characters thus far include Hound (a green Jeep Wrangler), Smokescreen (a blue Subaru Impreza WRC covered with stock-racing logos), Sideswipe (a red Dodge Viper convertible), and Silverstreak (né Bluestreak). Each retails for about $35 for the US version or $70 for Binaltech. http://www.transformerland.com/transformers-alternators.html http://www.cliffbee.com/reviews/btswiper.htm -- Sideswipe review http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/pl/page.news/id.965/dn/default.cfm -- 30-oct: Smokescreen and Sideswipe http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/pl/page.news/id.976/dn/default.cfm -- 21-nov: Hound http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/pl/page.news/id.982/dn/default.cfm -- 8-dec: Silverstreak Carmaker Mazda joined with Hasbro for co-promotion at the recent 2004 North American Autoshow. An Alternator version of their new Hydrogen Renesis RX-8 concept car gets star-treatment in an animated Flash site: http://www.mazdausa.com/MusaWeb/NA_Autoshow/frameset.html More toys have worn the "Optimus Prime" moniker than any other. The "Twentieth Anniversary Optimus Prime" is a return to the classic boxy shape of the COE Freightliner, with a new and surprisingly complicated transformation to a robot-mode near-identical to that of the cartoon. It's die-cast metal, its chest cavity contains an LED- lit Autobot Matrix of Leadership, and one of its accessories is an appropriately-sized Megatron in Walther P-38 gun-mode. The US version has slightly shorter exhaust stacks (for toy safety reasons), and a "battle-damaged" paint job. It retails for around $85. http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/op/ http://www.hasbro.com/transformers/pl/page.news/id.957/dn/default.cfm *** [3] Unicron: not to be confused with the planet-zapping Death Star ("Star Wars," 1977) the planet-grabbing Beast Planet ("War Planets" toy line, 1999), or Haydon IV (_Robotech: The End of the Circle_, 1989). [4] Although many of the early Transformers characters were the same shape in different colors (Rumble/Frenzy, Laserbeak/Buzzsaw, the Decepticon "Seeker" jets), Hasbro and Takara have become especially fond of "redecos" of a single character. Takara would release Japanese versions of US toys, with slighly modified, show-accurate colors; Hasbro would US versions of Japanese toys, with new names. Many molds from the "Beast Wars," "Beast Machines," and "Robots in Disguise" lines are currently being released as part of "Universe." [5] In the very first "Transformers" TV story (1984) Optimus battled Megatron atop a hydroelectric dam, each wielding a gladiator-style weapon extruded from his wrist -- something like "Gundam's" beam sabers (1977). Optimus's weapon was later dubbed an "energon axe." /* *************************************************************************** ** ON THE WEB ** ** The Brick Testament: the Bible in LEGO. ** Adventures in Anime Music: streaming radio. ** HyperRescueRobot: it's got arms! ** ************************************************************************ */ Across the centuries, artists have used every possible medium to depict the stories of the Bible. The latest medium simply happens to be LEGO bricks. Posed and photographed by the Rev. Brendan Powell Smith, the one-per-verse images of "The Brick Testament" are (a) really good models and (b) often hilarious (although possibly irreverent). Unlike the original, chapters are labeled with TV-like NSVC ratings (nudity, sex, violence, cursing). As an unfortunate demonstration that either plastic bricks or human intelligence are entirely too versatile, there is such a thing as "LEGO Porn;" and certain images under the Epistles of Paul qualify. http://www.thebricktestament.com Looking for anime music on the web? Try "Adventures in Anime Music," a program hosted by Mark Weiss on WQQQ-FM of US/CT/Lakeville. The site offers a streaming version of the program (Sundays at 22:00); 40 additional streams are offered through ToonRadio. (Note: AAM's front page uses the Shockwave Director plug-in, which is not packaged with Mozilla.) http://www.wwadventuresinanimemusic.com http://www.toonradio.net A Japanese company called TMSUK has announced an excavation vehicle designed for rescue work. Their "HyperRescueRobot T-52 Enryu" has a pair of treads, a bulldozer blade, operator's cabin, and -- making it candidate for First Mech of the Century -- a pair of pincer- equipped hydraulic arms. (As reported on Slashdot and news:rec.arts.anime.misc.) http://www.tmsuk.co.jp/eng/index.html -- Company site http://www.enryu.jp -- Product page http://www.enryu.jp/images/photo01_main -- Photo /* *************************************************************************** ** SOMNAMBULATIONS ** ** The Dairy-Case of Flying-Sideways Doom ** (Based loosely on Phil's deranged snooze-magination) ** ************************************************************************ */ My accomodations on the lowest level had obviously been retrofitted from a laundry room. Having spent half the night contriving a bunk from the few horizontal surfaces available, I was in no very agreeable mood when abrubtly awakened the next morning. The incessant noise resembled a snare drum gargling with yogurt and steel bearings, and there was no apparent means in the room to terminate it. I met my friend Griselda three corridors away from my room. "Oh good, you're up," Grizzy said by way of greeting, grabbing my arm and dragging me down a short flight of stairs and around an arched corner. "It's a milk-alarm," she explained in response to my unfinished question; and then proceeded to describe the network of conduits that plumbed the facility behind the walls, the resonance cavities, and the nature of the semi-intelligent cookie receptors. In my groggy state, I visualized chocolate chips drifting into slots on the surface of a globular cookie of indeterminate scale. "Look at the time -- I'll be late," she said, skidding to a stop that left me sprawled on the flagstones. Exiting in a swirl of brown hair, she assured me that the control-nexus was just around the corner and that I would have no trouble disabling the still- gurgling alarm. Grizzy's ability to give directions proved comparable to her estimate of my engineering skills -- lousy. Three corners later, I found myself in a dimly-lit chamber of rough-hewn stone, furnished as a meal room with trestle tables and vending machines. I spent a full minute prodding a bill-acceptor until I realized the alarm was controlled from the next machine over. It was a man-high upright cylinder, glass, lit from within and set directly into the rock. I poked the unlabeled knobs set into its base at waist-level. At this point I began flying sideways. Shortly thereafter, a pair of security guards stationed in the pedestrian shopping concourse of the conference center (five levels up) had the occasion to conduct the following exchange: "Didja just see sumpin' plumb peculiar, Josiah?" "If by that y'mean, did some young feller just go flying past like the wind-sock on th'antenna of an R/C racer, then yeah, Ah did." "And by the look on his face, he waren't enjoyin' it much. Not that Ah can be sure, his face bein' horizontal and flutterin' and all." "D'you reckon we should give'm a ticket for jaywalkin'?" "Don't see how we can rightly do that, seeing as how what he's doing kin hardly be called walkin', now. Oh, and here he comes again." Stairs... corridor... stairs... different corridor... stairs, impossible spin, stairs in reverse order... corridor again... ramp... maintenance hallway, unfurnished staircase, dead end, a second reversal... concourse... ramp... concourse in reverse... a fifth staircase... outside... across the street... up up up UP UP UP -- UP! -- the mirrored side of a skyscraper... STOP. The invisible string left wrapped through every passage of the conference center -- possibly by some giddy child with delusions of Theseus-hood -- and which had attached itself to the tip of my skull, went limp. After my organs stopped wobbling like so many lumps of Jell-O, I stood and looked around. TO BE CONTINUED /* ************************************************************************ ** Legalese ** Acknowledgments ** Opt-in/out Instructions ** *********************************************************************** */ The original content {layout, text} of this newsletter is copyright 2004 Phillip Thorne. Reproduction in whole or in part is permitted only as per applicable copyright law, if all copyright notices remain intact, and if citation trails (URLs or otherwise) are provided. That said, if you think colleagues would find an issue useful, please reproduce it -- but also suggest they subscribe. Those creative works {books, films, TV, websites, software, toys, etc.} referred-to {reviewed, synopsized, quoted, condensed, analyzed, etc.} herein are the property of their respective owners, are referred-to according to copyright law as interpreted in the U.S., and are cited whenever possible. No {endorsement, infringement, insult} is {expressed, implied, intended}, except where specifically stated. If you're receiving this newsletter, you've probably intentionally subscribed to it, or possibly you're interested in special topical coverage, or maybe I've sent you a teaser issue. To subscribe and unsubscribe, use the addresses below: Publisher: nsx@underbase.org (human) Newsletter: nsx-l@underbase.org (automated system) nsx-l-subscribe (to subscribe; blank subject) nsx-l-unsubscribe (to unsubscribe) /* *************************************************************************** ** *************************************************************************** ** The Non-Sequitur Express ** http://nsx.underbase.org/ ** Volume 6, Issue 1: Sunday, 18 January 2004 ** Copyright 1999-2004 Phillip Thorne, nsx@underbase.org ** *************************************************************************** ** ************************************************************************ */