/** ************************************************************************ *** ************************************************************************ *** The Non-Sequitur Express *** "I wear the cheese; the cheese does not wear me."* *** Published every eleven days or so - by Phillip Thorne *** http://nsx.underbase.org/ *** *** Volume 2, Issue 24: Monday, 18 September 2000 *** ************************************************************************ *** ********************************************************************** */ OBSERVATIONS & C: New "Andromeda" site, the Klingon Hamlet, orthography. ERRATA & O+A+A: Missing Flint & Vandenberg, Staples, Ugly, Broomsticks. UPCOMING: B5 widescreen, Mazes, "Buffy" season finale, BKN gone. plus Legalese, acknowledgements and opt-in/out instructions. /** ************************************************************************ *** OBSERVATIONS & COGITATIONS *** ********************************************************************** */ The latest element in the "Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda" constellation of websites, www.AndromedaAscendant.com, (devoted to the ship and its crew) is now up. There's not much technical data yet, and what there is was copied from www.allsystems.org, but we do learn the _Andromeda's_ 10-year service history and that her crew affectionately calls her "Rommie." I dunno -- I'd personally be more respectful when addressing a 1300-meter battleship, but if she really doesn't mind... Remember the famous line by the Klingon character General Chang in "Star Trek VI" (1991)? "You have not experienced Shakespeare until you've read him in the original Klingon." The "Hamlet" quotation was a bit of a bugaboo for Klingon language designer Marc Okrand, who -- just to be ornery -- hadn't included the verb "to be" in the lexicon. Well, the Klingon Language Institute (www.kli.org, founded 1992) has finally released _The Klingon Hamlet_. Available in bookstores everywhere -- or, to be strictly accurate, in the one "Waldenbooks" I checked -- it features the original Klingon on right-hand pages and an English (Terranglo?) translation on the left. Okrand's romanization, unfortunately, looks like ROT-13'd text with random capitalization -- it's extremely difficult to read in large blocks. The book does *not* use the dagger-shaped Klingon graphemes ("tlhIngan Hol") which may-or-may-not be part of the Unicode 3.0 standard. (Unicode, aka ISO/IEC-10646-2, is a standard for 16-bit encoding of as many of the world's writing systems as possible.) They were *proposed* for inclusion in Plane 1 (surrogates) as of 15-mar-2000, but that's the most recent data I can find on www.unicode.org. The addition of the J.R.R.Tolkein scripts Tengwar and Cirth (along with various hieroglyphs and cuneiforms) was proposed by the same expert, one Michael Everson of Ireland. Today's quote is from the mysterious Cheese Man in "Restless," the fourth season finale of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" -- see Upcoming. /** ************************************************************************ *** ERRATA & OMISSIONS, ADDENDA & ADMISSIONS *** ********************************************************************** */ In 2.21's Upcoming I listed the showtimes for current anime imports to the US, but I forgot at least one item: "Flint the Time Detective" on FoxKids Fridays. In 2.23 "Enumeration: NASA's mission-numbering scheme for the Space Shuttle" I left a big lacuna in regards to Vandenberg as a shuttle launch site. (Consistent usage of "fill this in" markers is recommended.) As it happens, the Shuttle has *never* launched from that location; nonetheless the digit "2" was reserved for it, in numbering scheme (2). In 2.23 "Observations" I included the bracketed explanation: "Staples [an office supply store]". One curious reader asks if I'm writing for posterity. Short answer: yes. You might note the filenaming scheme on nsx.underbase.org (i.e. printf("%03d-%03d.txt", $volume, $issue)) permits 999 volumes and 999 issues per volume (both counting from 001). I can thus rely on default lexicographic filename sorting till the year 2998, or mid-2499 should I adopt a six-month volume staring in 2001. Aside from such optimistic projections, I don't know the geographic location of several of my readers, or the geographic extent of the Staples chain. In 2.23, I called the character of Rev Bem (on the upcoming series "Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda") "ugly." This was perilously close to an opinion, which I strive to avoid in news coverage. (Well, technically it's not an opinion or a fact, but the third category, a taste -- see the relevant editorial in a mid-'80s issue of _Analog_.) See also: "registered witnesses" in Heinlein's _Stranger in a Strange Land_ (1961). When asked "What color is that house?" they might answer "It's white on this side." *** In 2.23 "Observations" I alluded to the possible hazards to human males of broomstick-riding vis-a-vis bike seats; one reader (an avid bicyclist) responds that they present certain difficulties for human *females* as well. As to what injuries might be suffered by gnomes, house-elves, goblins, veela, mer-people or giants (of either sex) I can't say, as none of them have been seen flying. We *have* seen players fall from their brooms during Quidditch, so regardless of any possible seat, and whatever biomechanical differences there are between dowels and seats, there's little evidence of any magical seat*belt* field. The reader mentions sidesaddle as a possibility. That technique is actually employed in another book, wherein a underperforming student at a witch academy whose dress code stipulates green neckties, at which teaches one very tall professor who wears vertical stripes, and a shorter one who wears horizontal, discovers a conspiracy and accidentally changes all the offending witches to snails. I forget the title, but it wasn't one of the _Bunnicula_ books. /** ************************************************************************ *** UPCOMING *** Series, Seasons, Episodes, Movies, Books *** ********************************************************************** */ HEADS UP... The Sci-Fi Channel begins airing "Babylon 5: The Widescreen Edition" on m-25-sep-19:00, starting with the 1993 pilot movie "The Gathering" on Monday and Tuesday. Since the series was originally and intentionally shot with a cinematic aspect ratio, this edition contains never-before- seen data. (Look! Off to the side! That Pak'ma'ra is eating the trash can!) Too bad we all have to view it letterboxed. Dang! It *would* happen that the *one* week I'm in a rush and don't bother scanning the next "Buffy" listing, that it's the one I want to tape -- 421 "Primeval," featuring the final confrontation between Adam- the-demonoid-cyborg and the Buffy-Giles-Willow-Xander gestalt. ("Buffycons! Merge to become -- Buffystator!" is *not* a line from the story. But it should be.) It's topped only by next week's wonderfully surreal season finale, 422 "Restless." ("Honestly, you meet the most appalling people.") The song stylings of Rupert Giles are not to be missed. Oooh! On f-29-sep-19:15, MoviePlex airs "Rona Jaffe's Mazes and Monsters," which is recommended and oft-cited by Kibo (of Usenet's alt.religion.kibology) as a really bad movie; apparently a college student and three friends get stuck in a game of "Dungeons & Dragons." It stars a very much younger (2000-1982=18) Tom Hanks. It looks like the entire BKN lineup has vanished from wgbh-48 and the Sci-Fi Channel -- "Captain Simian and the Space Monkeys," "Roughnecks: Starship Troopers Chronicles," and the rest. FOX has dropped "The X- Files" from Sunday nights for the next few weeks, slipping two eps of "That '70s Show" into its 21:00 slot. The syndicated "StarGate SG-1" on wtxf-29 might soon be shifting to its third season; tv.excite.com hasn't have episode title information since 16-sep. TOONS ETC. ... The Cartoon Network is still showing "Gundam Wing" weekdays 17:30 and midnight, but tv.excite.com only lists titles for the latter; the show will soon roll over back to the beginning. They're also still showing "Tenchi Muyo" weeknights 18:00, but the title's transmuted to "Tenchi in Tokyo" (it's abbreviated "Ten Tok"). I don't know where in the meta-storyline that fits; like many popular anime, the characters have been repackaged several times in distinct, irreconcilable continuities -- TV, movies and OAVs (aka OVAs or, as they're known in the US, direct-to-video). Gwg Battleship Libra 42 -- ton t 0919-0000 Gwg Target Earth 43 -- ton 2 0920-0000 Gwg Go Forth, Gundam Team 44 -- ton r 0919-0000 Gwg Signs of the Final Battle 45 -- ton f 0919-0000 Gwg Milardo's Decision 46 -- ton m 0919-0000 Gwg Collision in Space 47 -- ton t 0926-0000 Gwg Takeoff Into Confusion 48 -- ton w 0927-0000 Gwg Final Victor 49 -- ton r 0928-0000 Gwg The Shooting Star She Saw 01 -- ton f 0929-0000 PRIMETIME ETC. PROGRAMMING... Sim Bart Gets an Elephant 1f15 -- 29 t 0919-1830 Sim Simpsons Bible Stories aabf13 -- 29 t 0919-1900 r Buf Restless (season finale) 422 14 wb t 0919-2000 r Ang To Shansu in L.A. (season finale) 122 14 wb t 0919-2100 r Vgr Life Line 943/624 pg upn w 0920-1800 z 0923-1800 Sim Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo aabf18 -- 29 r 0921-1900 mov Gun Smith Cats: The Neutral Zone (30min) -- plx r 0921-1930 mov Gun Smith Cats: Swing High! (30min) -- plx r 0921-2000 mov Gun Smith Cats: High Speed Edge (30min) -- plx r 0921-2030 * Inv Beholder 114 pg sfc f 0922-2000 f 0922-2300 r SAM TKO Henry 111 pg upn f 0922-2100 * Fsc Vitas Mortis 203 14 sfc f 0922-2100 z 0923-0000 * SG1 The Curse 414 pg sho f 0922-2200 * Lex Gondola 305 -- sfc f 0922-2200 z 0923-0100 r EFC Abduction 321 pg 17 z 0923-1600 s 0931-2330 - SG1 ---- --- -- 29 z 0923-1600 * Inv Cat & Mouse 113 pg 48 z 0923-2000 Vgr Macrocosm 845/312 pg upn z 0923-2300 r Fut Hell is Other Robots 109 -- fox s 0924-1900 r Sim Little Big Mom babf04 -- fox s 0924-2000 - PJs Robbin' HUD 216 pg wb s 0924-2030 XF (Pre'mp'd by "That '70s Show") s 0924-2100 Sim Treehouse of Horror IX 5f22 -- 29 m 0925-1830 * Buf Buffy vs. Dracula 501 pg wb t 0926-2000 * Ang Judgment 201 -- wb t 0926-2100 r 7D The Cure 223 pg upn w 0927-2000 r Vgr The Haunting of Deck Twelve 945/625 pg upn w 0927-2100 mov Battle Arena Toshinden (60min) pg plx r 0928-2000 mov Rona Jaffe's Mazes and Monsters (1982) pg plx f 0929-1915 (105min) SAM (Pre'mp'd by awards show) f 0929-2100 r Inv The Catevari 102 pg sfc f 0929-2000 f 0929-2300 Fsc (Pre'mp'd by "Species II" (120min) f 0929-2100 * SG1 Serpent's Venom 413 pg sho f 0929-2200 For a full legend and user's manual, see nsx.underbase.org/symbols.htm. abc wpvi-6, cbs kyw-3, fox wtxf-29, ind wgtw-48, ind wfmz-69, nbc wcau-10, pbs whyy-12, pbs wybe-35, upn wpsg-57, wb wphl-17; plx MoviePlex, sci Sci-Fi Channel, sho Showtime, and tnt is TNT. 7D 7 Days, Ang Angel, Buf Buffy the Vampire Slayer, EFC Earth: Final Conflict, Fsc Farscape, Fut Futurama, Inv The Invisible Man, Lex Lexx: The Series, PJs The PJs, SAM Secret Agent Man, SG1 StarGate SG-1, Sim Simpsons, TNG Star Trek: The Next Generation, Vgr Star Trek: Voyager, XF The X-Files. STRIPPED SF... Star Trek: The Next Generation Weeknights (Tue,Thu,Fri) 21:00 1 hour, TV-PG, WFMZ-69 Skin of Evil 122 t 0919 Oil slick kills Yar, taunts Troi. We'll Always Have Paris 124 w 0920 Picard's old flame, time rift husband. The Neutral Zone 126 r 0921 Corpsicles and the Romulans are back. The Child 201 f 0922 Energy alien becomes Troi's baby. Where Silence Has Lease 202 t 0926 Omnipotent Nagilum traps, studies death. Elementary, Dear Data 203 w 0927 Oops! Moriarty can defeat Data-Holmes! The Outrageous Okona 204 r 0928 Data tries comedy, ruffian provokes war. The Schizoid Man 206 f 0929 Data's body hijacked by dirty old man. Babylon 5 Weekdays and Saturdays 06:00 1 hour, TV-PG, TNT Movements of Fire and Shadow 518 m 0918 Delenn to Minbar, L+G trapped on CP. The Fall of Centauri Prime 519 t 0919 Delenn drifts, Alliance nears CP. The Wheel of Fire 520 w 0920 G'Kar's followers, Sher' v. 'baldi. Objects in Motion 521 r 0921 Mars! And people leave. Objects at Rest 522 f 0922 Bad stuff happens. Sleeping in Light --- z 0923 20 years later, Sheridan dies. Babylon 5: The Widescreen Edition Weeknights M-F 19:00 1 hour, TV-PG, The Sci-Fi Channel The Gathering, part 1 --- m 0925 Our last, best hope for peace... The Gathering, part 2 --- t 0926 ...is full of intrigue and poison! Midnight on the Firing Line 104 w 0927 Narn attack Centauri outpost. Soul Hunter 101 r 0928 Frustrated ghoul grabs Delenn's soul. Born to the Purple 108 f 0929 Slave steals Londo's secrets. /** ************************************************************************ *** Legalese *** Acknowledgments *** Opt-in/out Instructions *** ********************************************************************** */ The set of creative works herein reviewed and analyzed, including the subset {books, movies, TV shows, toys}, are the property of their respective copyright holders. No infringement or endorsement is expressed, implied or intended. The original reviews and analyses are themselves copyright 2000 by Phillip Thorne. Certain data has been obtained and aggregated from, repeatedly and in particular: Excite tv.excite.com The Internet Speculative Fiction Database sfsite.com/isfdb/ Star Trek Continuum startrek.com If you're receiving this newsletter, you've probably intentionally subscribed to it. Or possibly you've procrastinated in subscribing and I'm sending it to you anyway. Or maybe you're a family member and I'm demonstrating that I'm still alive. In any case, to cancel your subscription, send an email message to pethorne@earthlink.net with the words "UNSUBSCRIBE NON-SEQUITUR" in the subject line and/or body. Capitalization and punctuation don't matter, since I'm doing this all manually. /** ************************************************************************ *** ************************************************************************ *** The Non-Sequitur Express *** http://nsx.underbase.org/ *** Volume 2, Issue 24: Monday, 18 September 2000 *** Copyright 1999-2000 Phillip Thorne, pethorne@earthlink.net *** ************************************************************************ *** ********************************************************************** */